McConnell to America: There’s some money on the nightstand.

Doug Ecks
2 min readOct 27, 2020

After ramming through a Supreme Court justice just days before an election, in the shortest confirmation hearing in decades, the Senate just adjourned til Nov 9th.

Photo by We-Vibe WOW Tech on Unsplash

Translation: Mitch McConnell just told America ‘Thanks baby, there’s some money on the nightstand’ because he just used us like an ill treated prostitute (no offense to sex workers.) We are facing one of the worst, if not the worst weeks of Covid since this pandemic started and the Senate’s response, having ejaculated ACB onto the Supreme Court is to go home and sleep it off.

And it’s not just the poor and middle class of America that should be feeling sore in their nether regions. Donald Trump, whose tweets have been the terror of good little ‘GOPers everywhere’ has said repeatedly he wants a bigger stimulus before the election than Pelosi. Well #MoscowMitch just fucked him without even the courtesy of a reach around, as we used to say in the Coast Guard, back when I was a sailor. McConnell has been remarkably exempt from Trump’s ire since they crossed swords briefly in 2017. I don’t think it’s them seeing eye to eye so much as McConnell is the one politician Trump fears.

If I had to speculate as to why, well Trump has known that his only protection against impeachment rests in Mitch’s purplish decaying necrotic little hands. And I’m sure Mitch has pointed out that even if he’s reelected and the Senate stays in Republican hands that dynamic doesn’t change, up until Trump is ready to disband the senate and end any pretense of democracy.

Of course the analogy I used is flawed in one major way. America is in fact not getting any money on the nightstand, as Corona virus swamps our ship of state, that money is staying in the treasury to be given to the wealthiest at some later date, after the election. An election that will be adjudicated by the hijacked Supreme Court, that is Moscow Mitch’s most lasting legacy.

If Biden wins and the Dems lack the nerve to add additional seats to the SCOTUS, than our ship of state is not just swamped, but well and truly sunk.

Doug Ecks

Doug Ecks, Esq is a lawyer and member of NLG-LA. He is also a stand up comic and author. You can support my writing at